It was almost infuriating how understanding he was, how gentle and patient. Jyn, by contrast, clutched at his arms as if that might be enough to keep him there, face turned toward the grass, her body trembling with her shaky breaths and efforts not to cry. She couldn't do this. She couldn't not do this. She'd spent the better part of who could even tell how many years without him, so she should have been fine to continue on her own, the way she had been for most of her life, should have been able just to walk away, but she couldn't and wouldn't. In her previous life with someone who was him but wasn't, she had tried that and failed miserably. Even then, she had long since told herself that she wouldn't leave him. That still held true.

But Force help her, it was agonizing to open herself up to this, to want something so much. She would have given up all the rest of it, the ship and the garden and the pets and the quiet and the lack of war, if it meant keeping him with her and alive. She would have slept on concrete under a bridge in a combat zone if that was what it took to have him at her side.

Being in love was a horrible thing.

She repeated his words from earlier in her head, I won't lose you to fear of losing you, until her breathing began to level out again. Her face was uncomfortably sticky from tears, but at least there were no gulping sobs, just some accompanying sniffles. "That's all I want now," she admitted, feeling small and helpless in his arms. The little girl in the cave again, waiting for someone to come find her. "That life. What you said. Bed and bathtub would just be a nice bonus."